Many of you know that I suffer from chronic insomnia. There's just so much random stuff going through my head at any given point in time that I wonder how the hell I ever sleep. Many of you also know Rajiv, my doppelgaenger. The first time that Devika saw the two of us together, her response was, "Oh, my God. There are two of you. I can't deal. I'm on the phone." It was brilliant.

So, under the jump is what happens when both Raj and I have insomnia and chat on AIM for hours.  We manage to discuss:

• whether or not our brains run on AMD v Intel
• just how annoying Dillon really is
• my love for PRS guitars
• my nephew
• why I am so awesome
• why Raj is so awesome
• toilet humour
• picking on Sejal
• my plans for my nephew
• Raj's plans for my nephew
• the hybrid beast known as DheeRaj.

It's pretty sweet. Check it out.  This one is password protected.  Ask for the password. -dx12:01:53 AM Dheeraj Chand: So I've been playing a lot of guitar here.
12:01:58 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Yeah?
12:02:02 AM Dheeraj Chand: I've come to truly love PRS guitars.
12:02:24 AM Dheeraj Chand: They have that amazing, deep tone, using fucking lipstick pickups. Who would have thought it possible?
12:03:10 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Santana?  :-)
12:03:50 AM Dheeraj Chand: Bah.
12:03:52 AM Dheeraj Chand: Fuck him.
12:03:59 AM Dheeraj Chand: He was brilliant through 1979.
12:05:21 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I think he still plays well.  I only fault him for pairing up with douches.
12:10:48 AM Dheeraj Chand: He doesn't do anything worth listening to any more, though, and he doesn't push the limits of his instrument as he once did.
12:10:58 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Do you have a PRS?
12:11:30 AM Dheeraj Chand: No, but I've been jamming with this country band.
12:15:17 AM Dheeraj Chand: They have a PRS and Les Paul Studio that I've been using.
12:15:45 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Sexy.  :-)
12:16:04 AM Dheeraj Chand: We play a lot of Civil War songs and Johnny Cash.
12:22:42 AM Dheeraj Chand: It's sort of awesome.
12:22:55 AM Dheeraj Chand: And we've recently branched out into country rock and gospel blues.
12:23:03 AM Rajiv B. Shah: That's your kind of stuff.  :-)
12:23:09 AM Dheeraj Chand: Yup.
12:23:28 AM Dheeraj Chand: As much experimental music as I may listen to, I love to bring it all back home, so to speak.
12:23:38 AM Rajiv B. Shah: That really makes me happy, man.
12:24:41 AM Dheeraj Chand: Back.
12:24:48 AM Dheeraj Chand: Sorry about the router problems. Sheesh.
Rajiv Bakulesh Shah came back (12:32:15 AM)
Rajiv Bakulesh Shah went away (12:32:15 AM)
12:36:50 AM Dheeraj Chand: I am completely convinced that Tumblin' Dice is the ultimate jam song.
2:50:52 AM Dheeraj Chand: Would you like to see something positively ridiculous?
2:51:07 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Always.
2:51:12 AM Dheeraj Chand: http://www.dheerajchand.com/dheeraj/2006/09/06/wherein-daryn-opposes-my-eyebrow-calls-me-an-arrogant-twit-and-suggests-that-we-are-the-ne-plus-ultrae-of-the-high-school-debate-community-part-the-first/
2:51:52 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Who's Daryn?
2:52:03 AM Dheeraj Chand: A long time buddy of mine.
2:52:05 AM Dheeraj Chand: She's awesome.
2:55:13 AM Rajiv B. Shah: This is funny.
2:55:58 AM Dheeraj Chand: Agreed.
2:56:02 AM Dheeraj Chand: I adore Daryn.
2:57:35 AM Rajiv B. Shah: What's the opposite of a firewall?
2:57:37 AM Rajiv B. Shah: A Watergate.
2:58:34 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Did you laugh?
2:58:44 AM Dheeraj Chand: We argue like this all the time.
2:58:51 AM Rajiv B. Shah: It's a joke.
3:04:22 AM Dheeraj Chand: It is rather amazing, no?
3:04:30 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Kind of ridiculous.
4:40:15 AM Dheeraj Chand: Hey, do you like Sinead o'Connor?
4:40:28 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I don't know anything about her.  Why?
4:41:10 AM Dheeraj Chand: Well, I absolutely adore her music.
4:41:22 AM Dheeraj Chand: She did an Irish remake of a Prince song, years ago, and it hooked me.
4:41:58 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Ah.
4:42:09 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Have you heard of JUDY AND MARY?
4:42:19 AM Dheeraj Chand: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hdjidfbMHDw
4:42:29 AM Dheeraj Chand: No.
4:43:22 AM Rajiv B. Shah: You may not like their style, but there's no other valid criticism.  They're a Japanese pop band, very playful, and they're all virtuosos.
4:47:28 AM Dheeraj Chand: Tell me what you think of the Irish rendition of the song.
4:47:30 AM Dheeraj Chand: I find it haunting.
4:47:52 AM Dheeraj Chand: In a very odd way, Irish vocal techniques are very similar to Rajasthani techniques.
4:47:57 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I can see the video, but I can't listen to it.  I don't have my headphones.
4:47:58 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Yeah?
4:48:08 AM Dheeraj Chand: Yeah.
4:48:19 AM Dheeraj Chand: I sometimes wonder how crazy it is that I have so much data in my head.
4:48:27 AM Dheeraj Chand: Seriously, dude, I must be powered by AMD.
4:48:46 AM Dheeraj Chand: Dheeraj Chand, Powered by AMD, running FreeBSD.
4:49:10 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Shit, nigga, I'm powered by MIPS.  Largely useless, but clean!
4:49:17 AM Dheeraj Chand: Dude.
4:49:24 AM Dheeraj Chand: I rule all that I may surveille.
4:49:59 AM Rajiv B. Shah: FreeBSD?  Nah.  Linux is The Way (TM).
4:50:15 AM Rajiv B. Shah: AMD is the Linux of chip makers.
4:50:37 AM Dheeraj Chand: BSD is a bit more stable, from what I understand.
4:50:50 AM Dheeraj Chand: Of course, stability is not a hallmark of my mind.
4:50:52 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Sure, and Intel chips are more stable.
4:51:29 AM Rajiv B. Shah: But who cares if your system locks up once every 10 years versus once every 11 years?
4:52:04 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Dude, don't deny your ghetto heritage.  You're AMD + Linux.
4:52:30 AM Dheeraj Chand: DX = Slackware, bitches
4:52:36 AM Rajiv B. Shah: There you go.
4:52:53 AM Dheeraj Chand: Take a snapshot of my brain and configure it how you will.
4:53:10 AM Dheeraj Chand: /usr/bin/dx
4:53:14 AM Dheeraj Chand: /
4:53:20 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Dillon?  Now he's pompous enough to be a FreeBSD type.  But he likes Starbucks too much.
4:53:31 AM Rajiv B. Shah: He's straight IBM PPC + OS X.
4:53:49 AM Dheeraj Chand: Okay, I have no objections to PPC + OS X.
4:53:59 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Neither do I.  I'm enjoying it as we speak.
4:54:12 AM Rajiv B. Shah: But does that platform personify you?  I don't think so.
4:54:13 AM Dheeraj Chand: However, you and I are powered by AMD and Slackware.
4:54:19 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Exactly.
4:54:21 AM Dheeraj Chand: /usr/bin/rshah333/
4:54:49 AM Rajiv B. Shah: No shit.  None of this iRaj@Mac.com.
4:55:03 AM Dheeraj Chand: iDouche@mac.com
4:55:08 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Heh heh.
4:55:15 AM Dheeraj Chand: http://www.myspace.com/iDouche
4:55:28 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Sima would be iLiner@MAC.com.
4:55:35 AM Dheeraj Chand: HA!
4:55:50 AM Dheeraj Chand: iAmAnnoying@mac.com
4:56:19 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Wow, I'm lame.  I had to click your MySpace URL to see if it really existed.
4:57:29 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Do you ever use the dictionary that comes with OS X Tiger?
4:57:32 AM Dheeraj Chand: u != l33t
4:57:57 AM Dheeraj Chand: DX=(DX("DX=l33t"))
4:58:20 AM Dheeraj Chand: No.
4:58:35 AM Dheeraj Chand: I sort of want to have a dual boot with Yellow Dog.
4:58:40 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I don't think dx really stands for Delta Chi.  I think it stands for the derivative with respect to x.
4:59:20 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Boot Camp is brilliant.  At the moment, I'm triple booting: OS X, Gentoo, and Windows XP.
4:59:40 AM Dheeraj Chand: dx/dawesome
4:59:57 AM Dheeraj Chand: You've got Gentoo on a Mac?
5:00:10 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Under OS X and Gentoo, all my hardware is fully supported.  Under Windows XP, all my hardware except my built-in iSight camera is fully supported.
5:00:13 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Yes!
5:00:16 AM Dheeraj Chand: No shit?
5:00:18 AM Dheeraj Chand: Really?
5:00:19 AM Rajiv B. Shah: No shit!
5:00:26 AM Dheeraj Chand: u = l33t
5:00:37 AM Rajiv B. Shah: It even runs Rajiv B. Shah, believe it or not.
5:00:42 AM Dheeraj Chand: u > m4rk l1nf0rd : l33t
5:01:28 AM Rajiv B. Shah: You know what's the l33t3st feeling in the world?  Launching the OS X activity monitor, and seeing two CPU graphs.
5:01:35 AM Dheeraj Chand: w00t!
5:01:37 AM Rajiv B. Shah: That's right, niggaz!
5:01:46 AM Dheeraj Chand: Bitches, I represent twice!
5:02:19 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Speaking of which, AMD just announced quad-core Opterons.
5:02:53 AM Dheeraj Chand: Shut up.
5:02:58 AM Dheeraj Chand: I'd heard about this.
5:02:59 AM Dheeraj Chand: Really?
5:03:06 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Doesn't Opteron just sound like it should mean "raptor?"  The lightening-fast pack predator who will drive the brontosaurus that is Intel straight into extinction.
5:03:26 AM Dheeraj Chand: Go snatch some birds from the trees, bitches.
5:03:32 AM Dheeraj Chand: Opteron will beat some ass.
5:03:36 AM Rajiv B. Shah: It already is.
5:03:43 AM Dheeraj Chand: Jesus, quad?
5:03:52 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Quad-core!  64-bit!
5:03:57 AM Dheeraj Chand: Will Warcraft ever be the same again?
5:04:15 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Are you kidding me?  It'd run at like a thousand FPS!
5:04:24 AM Dheeraj Chand: Dude, with a processor like that, my shit will compile before I finish typing it.
5:04:41 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Yeah, it's absurd.  Something like 8 MB L2 cache.
5:04:50 AM Rajiv B. Shah: That's on-chip cache.
5:04:56 AM Dheeraj Chand: So, essentially, it approximates 1% of Raj Processing Power.
5:04:58 AM Dheeraj Chand: RPP.
5:04:58 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Shared between the cores.
5:05:06 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Hahaha!
5:05:31 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Yeah, that quad-core Opteron runs at about 2 DheeraMIPS.
5:05:42 AM Dheeraj Chand: Brilliant.
5:05:48 AM Dheeraj Chand: We rule all that we may surveille.
5:05:58 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Oh shit.  You're not logging this, are you?
5:06:32 AM Dheeraj Chand: Of course I am.
5:06:38 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Fuck me.
5:06:39 AM Dheeraj Chand: So are you, iFag.
5:06:54 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Oh, hell no.  That was the first thing I disabled in iChat.
5:07:05 AM Dheeraj Chand: l0gz = 0wnz0r
5:07:09 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I don't want my mom Spotlighting through my porn.
5:08:04 AM Rajiv B. Shah: It makes me feel kind of dirty, actually.  Using the same computer to beat off to porn and burn a CD of classical Indian music for my mom.
5:08:20 AM Dheeraj Chand: Dude.
5:08:46 AM Dheeraj Chand: I develop Democratic web campaigns, watch The West Wing and check MySpace on the same computer.
5:08:56 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Does it disturb you?
5:08:58 AM Dheeraj Chand: Yes.
5:09:39 AM Dheeraj Chand: Would you like to see my most recent favourite picture of El Delta con Chi?
5:09:53 AM Rajiv B. Shah: You need a Mac Pro for your web development, a MacBook for The West Wing, and a Mac Mini for YourSpace.
5:10:04 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Yes.
5:10:15 AM Dheeraj Chand: I'll cut you with a knife.
5:10:24 AM Rajiv B. Shah: You think I'm kidding.
5:10:28 AM Dheeraj Chand: http://www.dheerajchand.com/pictures/v/random/dheerajchandatneworganizing.jpg.html
5:10:39 AM Dheeraj Chand: The amazing thing is that I had no idea why this picture was being taken.
5:10:48 AM Rajiv B. Shah: LoL!
5:10:49 AM Dheeraj Chand: I was just standing there, doing what I was doing.
5:11:01 AM Rajiv B. Shah: That's really funny.
5:11:09 AM Dheeraj Chand: I think that my confusion is obvious in my expression.
5:11:19 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I like the goatee.
5:11:26 AM Dheeraj Chand: Thanks.
5:11:36 AM Dheeraj Chand: It's actually, however, a Van Dyke.
5:11:45 AM Dheeraj Chand: A goatee would lack the connecting moustaches.
5:12:00 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Ah.
5:12:30 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Your birthday is the 10th, right?
5:12:57 AM Dheeraj Chand: Yes.
5:13:14 AM Dheeraj Chand: http://www.ravnwood.com/archives/001361.php
5:13:16 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I remember because you were especially distraught on 9/11.
5:13:35 AM Dheeraj Chand: http://www.enquirer.com/editions/1999/02/09/loc_vhistory_of_goatees.html
5:13:39 AM Dheeraj Chand: Yes.
5:13:41 AM Dheeraj Chand: It sucked.
5:13:55 AM Dheeraj Chand: On the day after my birth, the city of my birth was attacked.
5:14:00 AM Dheeraj Chand: What a douche.
5:14:12 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I've just added your birthday to my iCal.
5:14:22 AM Dheeraj Chand: So you can iForget?
5:14:45 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Heh heh.
5:15:34 AM Rajiv B. Shah: This is convenient.  Your birthday is 8 days before my girlfriend's.
5:19:05 AM Dheeraj Chand: Lovely.
5:23:04 AM Dheeraj Chand: So we'll both be forgotten!
5:24:59 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Yeah, somehow, Megan is cool with that bullshit.
5:25:06 AM Dheeraj Chand: Genius.
5:25:08 AM Dheeraj Chand: Well done,sir.
5:25:16 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I don't understand.
5:25:23 AM Dheeraj Chand: Dude, I should totally broadcast this conversation to the world.
5:25:32 AM Dheeraj Chand: No one would believe it if I described it otherwise.
5:25:56 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Dude, I wish I had logs of some of the conversations we've had in real life.
5:26:06 AM Dheeraj Chand: HAHAHAHA!
5:26:17 AM Dheeraj Chand: Do you remember that time I got mad at my sister's Brittney Spears CD?
5:26:39 AM Rajiv B. Shah: You fucking ejected it out of the CD player, bit it, and chunked it out the window.
5:26:47 AM Dheeraj Chand: That recently went through my mind.
5:26:59 AM Dheeraj Chand: I cannot believe that I was so angry that I bit the damn thing.
5:27:00 AM Rajiv B. Shah: You bit it!  I think you were growling too!
5:27:06 AM Dheeraj Chand: I WAS SOBER.
5:27:23 AM Dheeraj Chand: How ridiculous was that?
5:27:26 AM Rajiv B. Shah: "Hey, Raj, I just took the most magnificent dump."
5:27:26 AM Rajiv B. Shah: "So I heard."
5:27:38 AM Dheeraj Chand: "Yo, Raj, come look at my turds."
5:27:46 AM Rajiv B. Shah: "Wanna go to Metro?"
5:27:53 AM Rajiv B. Shah: "Give me about 20 minutes.  I need to recover."
5:28:35 AM Dheeraj Chand: "Dude, I seriously think that reading Heidegger while eating a sandwich, drinking a Shiner and taking a dump is heaven."
5:29:20 AM Rajiv B. Shah: No one believes me when I tell them about that stuff.  Not even Megan.
5:29:46 AM Dheeraj Chand: "Oh, my God. I just took a shit. Dude, I am so hungry."
5:30:01 AM Rajiv B. Shah: "Raj, I can't move.  I feel so empty."
5:30:30 AM Dheeraj Chand: "It's as if someone took an ice cream scoop to my intestines."
5:30:52 AM Dheeraj Chand: "Dheeraj, you're fucking crazy."
5:31:01 AM Dheeraj Chand: "No, man, you don't understand. I'm hollow."
5:31:11 AM Rajiv B. Shah: "Go ahead.  Tell whoever you want.  They won't believe you."
5:31:21 AM Dheeraj Chand: I am a genius.
5:31:27 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Fuck.
5:31:44 AM Dheeraj Chand: Remember that time I clogged up the toilet and locked you in the bathroom?
5:31:51 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Wow, that sucked.
5:31:59 AM Dheeraj Chand: No, actually, I believe that that ruled.
5:32:32 AM Rajiv B. Shah: And, while I was locked in the bathroom, Sejal asked how to spell Nietzsche.
5:32:38 AM Dheeraj Chand: RIGHT.
5:32:45 AM Dheeraj Chand: "How do you spell Nietzsche?"
5:33:03 AM Dheeraj Chand: "How do I spell Nietzsche? The same way that one does, you twit."
5:33:12 AM Rajiv B. Shah: LoL!
5:33:20 AM Dheeraj Chand: That certainly didn't go over well.
5:33:40 AM Rajiv B. Shah: "There are about 10 Nietzsche books within grabbing distance from you.  Look it up!"
5:33:43 AM Dheeraj Chand: What was particularly amazing about that was that I had a copy of der Wille zu Macht sitting right in front of her when she asked.
5:33:52 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Yeah.
5:33:59 AM Dheeraj Chand: It was on my desk.
5:34:02 AM Dheeraj Chand: On my bloody desk.
5:34:16 AM Rajiv B. Shah: That was a fun weekend.  :-)
5:34:19 AM Dheeraj Chand: The same desk, I might add, at which she was seated.
5:34:23 AM Dheeraj Chand: What a silly girl.
5:34:26 AM Dheeraj Chand: I miss her so much.
5:34:34 AM Rajiv B. Shah: How's she doing?
5:34:42 AM Dheeraj Chand: You should get an MSN Passport just to chat with her on MSN Messenger.
5:34:43 AM Dheeraj Chand: I did.
5:34:51 AM Dheeraj Chand: Oh, you know her.
5:34:57 AM Dheeraj Chand: Stupid love drama.
5:35:25 AM Dheeraj Chand: Dude, I am convinced that she and I are going to live together one day, unmarried and loving it.
5:35:38 AM Dheeraj Chand: It'll be Jim Beam o'Clock twenty-hours a day!
5:35:44 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Heh heh.
5:36:12 AM Dheeraj Chand: You know what my alter ego is, right?
5:36:17 AM Dheeraj Chand: Sharabi Daroowalla.
5:36:26 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I was about to ask, which one?
5:36:31 AM Dheeraj Chand: You're right.
5:36:35 AM Dheeraj Chand: I have a couple.
5:36:39 AM Dheeraj Chand: Oh, good God.
5:36:47 AM Dheeraj Chand: I had a total linguistic breakdown the other day.
5:36:53 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Yeah?
5:37:16 AM Dheeraj Chand: So I was at a bar with this woman, Elizabeth, two of her friends, Nanda, a South Indian, and Michaelis, a Greek, and my friends Kyle and Dave.
5:37:32 AM Dheeraj Chand: Kyle prefers German, Dave is trying to learn conversational Latin,
5:37:40 AM Dheeraj Chand: Elizabeth speaks English,
5:38:03 AM Rajiv B. Shah: LoL!
5:38:24 AM Dheeraj Chand: Nanda was attempting to speak Panjabi, but delivering weak South Indian Hindi and Michaelis was so thrilled to find someone who'd studied Greek that he started throwing Euripides, Herodotus and Thucydides at me.
5:38:48 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Were you drunk?  That might've made it easier.
5:39:02 AM Dheeraj Chand: Ordinarily, I'm quite fucking competent, but all of this at one time, combined with all that I'd had to drink, led to the Blue Screen of Death.
5:39:16 AM Dheeraj Chand: Everyone else was far more drunk than I was.
5:39:24 AM Rajiv B. Shah: LoL!
5:39:34 AM Dheeraj Chand: So it was, "Oy, Punju, ek aur pio gay?"
5:40:04 AM Dheeraj Chand: "Ego, Herodotos, Hallicarnasoi..." (which was incorrect, and threw me off more.)
5:40:15 AM Dheeraj Chand: "Dheeraj, willst du mehr trinken?"
5:40:30 AM Dheeraj Chand: "Indicus, mihi da frumentum."
5:40:41 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Damn.
5:40:46 AM Dheeraj Chand: This led to the BSoD.
5:41:11 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Yeah.  I prefer to speak one language at a time.
5:41:21 AM Dheeraj Chand: Of course, that could also be expanded to "Breakdown Surrender of Drunk."
5:41:47 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Belligerent Slurring of Dheeraj?
5:42:08 AM Dheeraj Chand: Brilliant Suggestions of Dheeraj
5:42:17 AM Dheeraj Chand: Badass Suppositions of Dheearj
5:42:29 AM Dheeraj Chand: Breathtaking Sexiness of Dheeraj
5:42:40 AM Rajiv B. Shah: In that state of drunkenness?  Un-fucking-likely.  ;-)
5:42:45 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Well, all except that last one, sugar.
5:42:50 AM Dheeraj Chand: Dude, I rule all that I may surveille.
5:42:52 AM Dheeraj Chand: Never forget that.
5:42:58 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I'll try not to.
5:43:20 AM Dheeraj Chand: The only challenges to my suzerainty are Michael Alan Linford and Philip Gabriel Kerpen.
5:44:03 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Do you speak to Linford often?
5:44:20 AM Dheeraj Chand: I talk to three Linfords with great regularity.
5:44:25 AM Dheeraj Chand: Mark is actually dating a buddy of mine.
5:44:35 AM Dheeraj Chand: Pat is in NY state, being Army material.
5:44:42 AM Dheeraj Chand: Michael is being a douche, SOP.
5:44:51 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I rarely see Michael on AIM these days.
5:45:00 AM Dheeraj Chand: He uses Google Chat, mostly.
5:45:05 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Ah.
5:45:07 AM Dheeraj Chand: You have to call him, though, or SMS him.
5:45:26 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I'll ask him to add me to his Google Chat list.  I have a Jabber account.
5:45:39 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I think his company has banned AIM on their network.  Dumb.
5:45:51 AM Rajiv B. Shah: In my experience, if you have to do that, you've already lost.
5:46:15 AM Dheeraj Chand: Especially since they issue Blackberries that have AIM pre-installed.
5:46:17 AM Dheeraj Chand: Morons.
5:46:26 AM Dheeraj Chand: They should really put me in charge of everything.
5:46:31 AM Dheeraj Chand: The world would be far better.
5:46:32 AM Rajiv B. Shah: LoL!
5:46:53 AM Dheeraj Chand: I should warn you that I have reached the point of insomnia where I feel that the world should see what we discuss.
5:47:05 AM Dheeraj Chand: There are good odds that this log will be shared with people.
5:47:29 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Oh, fuck.  No one who doesn't already know I'm crazy, please.
5:47:33 AM Dheeraj Chand: y0 s0y 3l r3y ph1l0s0ph3r
5:49:47 AM Dheeraj Chand: I just out-crazied you.
5:49:50 AM Dheeraj Chand: Relax.
5:50:03 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Heh.
5:50:16 AM Dheeraj Chand: Dude.
5:50:28 AM Dheeraj Chand: Can you imagine a garage remix of Merle Haggard songs?
5:50:35 AM Rajiv B. Shah: No.
5:50:37 AM Dheeraj Chand: I swear to God that that's next.
5:50:51 AM Dheeraj Chand: Nashville pop and hip-pop have already come together.
5:51:07 AM Dheeraj Chand: Look up "Honky tonk badonkadonk" some time.
5:51:19 AM Rajiv B. Shah: You just made that up.
5:51:41 AM Dheeraj Chand: http://www.enquirer.com/editions/1999/02/09/loc_vhistory_of_goatees.html
5:51:46 AM Dheeraj Chand: Oops.
5:51:48 AM Dheeraj Chand: Hang on.
5:51:55 AM Dheeraj Chand: http://www.cowboylyrics.com/lyrics/adkins-trace/honky-tonk-badonkadonk-15326.html
5:52:06 AM Rajiv B. Shah: No way.
5:52:22 AM Dheeraj Chand: Indeed, there is a way.
5:52:32 AM Dheeraj Chand: This has a modal qualifier of "existent."
5:52:55 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I can't decide whether this is brilliant or nauseating.
5:53:11 AM Dheeraj Chand: Dude, modus ponens.
5:53:20 AM Dheeraj Chand: +brilliant +nauseating
5:53:21 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Honkey Tonk Badonkadonk would make a good screen name.
5:53:51 AM Dheeraj Chand: Why don't you go ahead and get iGuju, first?
5:53:58 AM Rajiv B. Shah: iFag.
5:54:03 AM Dheeraj Chand: Yes, you are.
5:54:05 AM Dheeraj Chand: iRule
5:54:45 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Apple are set to make a big announcement on Sep 12.  I wonder if they're going to announce a new letter campaign.
5:55:17 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Can you imagine an xMac?  An xBook?  Wow.
5:58:38 AM Dheeraj Chand: Hmm...
5:58:52 AM Dheeraj Chand: I think that they and Google are going to launch a political party.
5:59:07 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Yeah, they have a lot of common goals and such.
5:59:20 AM Dheeraj Chand: Google has a seat on the Apple board.
5:59:24 AM Dheeraj Chand: Right next to Al Gore.
5:59:27 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Right.
5:59:48 AM Dheeraj Chand: Seriously, the intersection of Apple, Google and Gore sort of thrills me.
6:00:11 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I don't know, though.  In many ways, Apple's hands are tied.
6:01:04 AM Dheeraj Chand: True.
6:01:15 AM Dheeraj Chand: However, they are the Dheeraj of the computing world.
6:01:33 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Google, however, are free to do whatever the fuck they like.
6:01:44 AM Dheeraj Chand: They sort of stroll around, being awesome and smashing paradigms, while everyone struggles to catch up.
6:02:10 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Hahaha!
6:02:20 AM Dheeraj Chand: I shit on paradigms!
6:02:28 AM Dheeraj Chand: Of course, I rest afterwards.
6:02:38 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I :-p paradigms.
6:02:57 AM Dheeraj Chand: u !=l33t
6:03:29 AM Dheeraj Chand: DX > BSD> Raj
6:03:36 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I must say, iChat has the best emoticons of any chat program I've used.
6:06:33 AM Dheeraj Chand: Dude, this will be my first birthday in my life without either one member of my family or my ATX crew being present.
6:06:42 AM Dheeraj Chand: It's really going to suck.
6:07:26 AM Rajiv B. Shah: You'll make up for it the next time you visit TX.  :-)
6:07:53 AM Dheeraj Chand: Yeah, and I'll have a nephew, to boot!
6:08:18 AM Rajiv B. Shah: When are you coming?
6:08:41 AM Dheeraj Chand: No time soon.
6:10:37 AM Dheeraj Chand: My nephew is going to rule.
6:10:49 AM Dheeraj Chand: Have you saved up to buy him his first Linux box, yet?
6:11:02 AM Dheeraj Chand: I already have a whole bunch of Latin, Greek, German and Sanskrit for him.
6:11:10 AM Dheeraj Chand: I also have his first necktie.
6:11:26 AM Dheeraj Chand: Once he's born, I'm taking him to Brooks Brothers to get him a suit.
6:11:45 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I already have a Linux box.  I've been waiting for someone who could use it.
6:11:53 AM Dheeraj Chand: dheeraj 2.0
6:11:59 AM Dheeraj Chand: This kid is going to RULE ALL.
6:12:06 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Pentium IV, 2.8 GHz.  256 MB DDR.  Gentoo.
6:12:17 AM Dheeraj Chand: There is no way that this kid is going to wear douchebag baby clothes.
6:12:21 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Abit motherboard.  I poured my heart into that machine.
6:12:29 AM Dheeraj Chand: He'll have nice suits and ties from an early age.
6:12:51 AM Rajiv B. Shah: And, if I have any say, there's no way he's going to have a Fischer Price computer running Tinker Toy OS.
6:13:01 AM Dheeraj Chand: TTOS = BS
6:13:11 AM Dheeraj Chand: DUDE.
6:13:14 AM Rajiv B. Shah: TTOS = BSOD.  QED.
6:13:23 AM Dheeraj Chand: He can be DheeRaj 2.0
6:13:28 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Hahaha!
6:13:48 AM Dheeraj Chand: "Translate your Latin!"
6:13:52 AM Dheeraj Chand: "Play your Chopin!"
6:13:57 AM Rajiv B. Shah: "Compile your kernel!"
6:14:06 AM Dheeraj Chand: "Is that an extraneous comment line in your code, bitch?"
6:14:09 AM Dheeraj Chand: "But I'm five!
6:14:10 AM Dheeraj Chand: "
6:14:13 AM Rajiv B. Shah: LoL!
6:14:17 AM Dheeraj Chand: "Get used to it, bitch."
6:14:40 AM Rajiv B. Shah: We have to decide what he's going to be when he grows up.
6:14:44 AM Dheeraj Chand: "Fuck, Raj Mama, can I have a cigarettte?"
6:14:53 AM Rajiv B. Shah: What do you think?  How about a double major?  Math and classics?
6:14:57 AM Dheeraj Chand: He's goiing to be president.
6:15:01 AM Dheeraj Chand: That's our nephew!
6:15:04 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Yes, of course.
6:15:15 AM Rajiv B. Shah: But before that?
6:15:42 AM Dheeraj Chand: Senator from Texas.
6:15:52 AM Rajiv B. Shah: He'll need a career before politics.
6:16:08 AM Rajiv B. Shah: He'll be independently wealthy.  He'll retire when he's 35.  And that's when he'll run for senate.
6:16:09 AM Dheeraj Chand: Hmmm....
6:16:13 AM Dheeraj Chand: No.
6:16:19 AM Dheeraj Chand: He has to go through the course.
6:16:35 AM Dheeraj Chand: City Council -> Congress -> Senate -> President
6:16:41 AM Dheeraj Chand: I want my nephew at every level of power.
6:16:53 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Hmm...  Yeah, OK.
6:17:01 AM Dheeraj Chand: He can double major in Philosophy and Math, though.
6:17:05 AM Dheeraj Chand: And minor in music.
6:17:07 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Wait, not math.
6:17:10 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Physics.
6:17:21 AM Dheeraj Chand: The real question, though, is to get Devika to relinquish control over 2.0 to us.
6:17:21 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Philosophy, physics, music.  Good.
6:17:31 AM Dheeraj Chand: He would be the distilled essence of us!
6:17:40 AM Rajiv B. Shah: See?  He has to go to law school and become a patent lawyer.  So he needs a technical background.
6:17:54 AM Dheeraj Chand: Hmm...
6:18:01 AM Rajiv B. Shah: The physics major would cover it.
6:18:07 AM Dheeraj Chand: Yes.
6:18:14 AM Dheeraj Chand: But he has to minor in math and music, then.
6:18:19 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Right.
6:18:26 AM Dheeraj Chand: We should start saving up for his first piano.
6:18:31 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Which university?  Stanford?
6:18:33 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Ooh!
6:18:44 AM Rajiv B. Shah: He'll earn his philosophy degree from Harvard, and his physics degree from MIT!
6:18:50 AM Dheeraj Chand: Genius.
6:19:26 AM Dheeraj Chand: I have already decided, by the way, to consistently address the boy as "Junior."
6:19:30 AM Dheeraj Chand: Not Neal, Jr.
6:19:42 AM Dheeraj Chand: It's strongly implied that he'll be raised as my Deputy.
6:20:02 AM Rajiv B. Shah: When he's president, he'll appoint us to his cabinet.
6:20:16 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Would you like to be secretary of state?
6:20:34 AM Dheeraj Chand: That would be pretty neat.
6:20:40 AM Dheeraj Chand: Where would you go, NSF?
6:20:52 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Yeah, that, or secretary of education?
6:20:59 AM Dheeraj Chand: HA!
6:21:09 AM Dheeraj Chand: A song just came on my iTunes that reminded me of an old Raj joke.
6:21:17 AM Dheeraj Chand: Medication, by Spiritualized.
6:21:34 AM Dheeraj Chand: "Dheeraj, what the hell is it with you and I-IV songs about drugs?"
6:21:47 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Hahaha!
6:22:17 AM Dheeraj Chand: "Dude, Raj, Heroin is seriously the greatest thing written since T.S. Eliot."
6:23:12 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Overheard, from one auntie to another, after the election of the first Indian-American president: Oh, Madhuri, did you see that nice Gujarati boy next to the president?  I think he's a doctor!
6:23:24 AM Dheeraj Chand: OY!
6:23:27 AM Dheeraj Chand: You stole my joke!
6:23:32 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Hahaha!
6:23:33 AM Dheeraj Chand: It's actually as follows:
6:24:23 AM Dheeraj Chand: The first Indian-American is being inaugurated President. His mummy is so proud. She leans over to the fellow to the right of her and asks, "You see that chap with his hand on the Bible?" The fellow responds, "Well, yes, of course." "Well, his brother is a doctor."
6:24:37 AM Rajiv B. Shah: There you go.
6:25:37 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in?  I think that's how dogs spend their lives. - Sue Murphy
6:26:08 AM Dheeraj Chand: Would you like to see two awesome pictures of my dog?
6:26:13 AM Rajiv B. Shah: Yes.
6:26:33 AM Dheeraj Chand: http://dheerajchand.com/pictures/v/random/DSCI0011.JPG.html
6:26:45 AM Dheeraj Chand: http://dheerajchand.com/pictures/v/random/DSCI0012.JPG.html
6:27:07 AM Rajiv B. Shah: I like the first one.  :-)
6:27:13 AM Dheeraj Chand: He's so awesome.
6:27:34 AM Dheeraj Chand: He just sort of hangs out, being awesome.
6:32:55 AM Dheeraj Chand: More people should emulate my dog.